I go back to work in a week...November 15 to be exact. And then maternity leave is over. I will never get this time back. I will never have the chance to be with Sofia when my only purpose is to take care of her. Sure I have summers off and holiday breaks, but it won't be the same. I can't believe it's been 12 weeks already! (Total of almost 13 weeks once I go back) Was it everything i hoped it would be?
The first two weeks were such a blur, i barely remember a thing! It seemed like our place was super busy with my parents here and lots of welcomed visitors. The following weekend my best friends from home came to visit. Then the isolation started. Those first few weeks were just lonely. Sofia only slept and ate - there was no play time then. I would sit here just hoping that friends would come by and sometimes they would, but not as often as I had hoped. In retrospect, i should have opened my mouth a little and actually invited friends over more. Why do I expect people to read my mind?
So now i sit here and wonder if I've done enough with my time. Have I read to her enough? Was there enough tummy time? What about the TV? Did i have it on too much? I know it's not late for these things, but now my time with her will be limited and if I didn't get in enough reading now for instance, how can I possibly find the time in the future?
I'm thankful for this time and am going to try to take this next and final week very slowly and appreciate every single happy, laughing, crying, pooping moment.
Yes, savor it Tracey!!!! And I think reflecting back and wondering if you could have done things differently...that is something you will probably ask yourself many times over the next 18 years!!!! I am sure you gave miss Sofia everything she needed and more. I have no doubts yours daughters needs will always be met. xoxoxoxox
ReplyDeleteI am totally with you. the thought of going back to work is starting to invoke this sense of panic. I know it will be fine once we get back into the swing of things!!! We have a whole new reason to hurry home from work!
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