Tuesday, March 15, 2011

How soon they forget...

People are funny.  Didn't I just go through 5 years of infetility?  Didn't people witness me being very open about our sturggle and then witness the aftermath of 4 BFN?  Did everyone just forget about all that?  Because people won't stop asking me if we're ready for another one!  I don't mean to be rude, but are these people dumb?  They act like I now have some sort of baby making potion.  It is as if none of that infertility stuff ever happened.

And so therein lies the struggle between holding on to my IF roots and being treated normal.  I don't mind being treated like a normal girl, but it makes for an awkward discussion.  I am forced to say "Well.....I'm not really sure how that would happen...you know....since I'm broken and all."  True, I have two little babies in the freezer, but more on that later.  Clearly, I have exhausted my resources for funding another IVF cycle.  But that's when they get really excited and tell me about how every single person they know who went through infertility treatment miraculously became pregnant naturally after they had their first.  While I know that these stories exist, I will not be one of them.  I basically have no fallopian tubes.  This baby would truly be a miracle.  And I'm not sure I'm ready for the responsibility that goes along with such a miracle because the divine intervention necessary for it could be a bit intimidating.

So I'm back to smiling and saying "We'll see..." when I don't feel like getting into it.  Once an IFer, always an IFer.


  1. Agreed! I think twins makes it a bit easier because EVERYONE asks the question "So do twins run in your family" to which I have no problem saying "nope...these are petri dish babies"

  2. Ugh! Who ever came up with the idea that if you get pregnant once tort body will magically become fertile myrtle !? I can't tell you how many times people said that to us!

  3. It really is amazing how stupid people can be. We get that question too and it's really insulting to me, because I'm proud of the road we took to get here. Paisley was a hard-fought pregnancy and a tough little fetus. So, I don't want to be treated just like any normal girl. :) And if I get pregnant again, wonderful. But I'm sure not counting on it!

  4. People have already started asking us that question too and our baby's only a month old!!

    You're so right, once an IF-er, always an IF-er.