Saturday, December 19, 2009

I'm not mad at ya...

Pet Peeve of the Day:
PG women who forget their IF roots.

There's this one girl I know who is happily expecting.  She went through waaaaay more cycles than anyone I've ever had contact with - 9 IVFs (although by now don't we all feel we know IVF Queen, Brooke Shields?).  She is in the home stretch with 8 weeks to go.  She has now gotten into the habit of complaining about being pregnant.  Now I'm sure there are things to complain about.  I know there will be pain and discomfort, inconveniences, and frustrations.  I completely understand that pregnancy brings with it much to complain about.  I don't, however, see how anyone can complain about being pregnant.  Do you see the difference? 

Consider these two statements:  1.  "I'm so big and fat that I can't even think about bending over to tie my shoe!" and 2.  "I'm so big and fat that I can't even think about bending over to tie my shoe!  Please, can't this pregnancy just be over?!"

I realize I'm being hyper-sensitive (and I've earned the right to be, thank you), but if that's how you want to handle the last weeks of pregnancy, just please remember that there are girls out there still fighting the fight and SHUT UP about it.  Go complain to your naturally conceiving friends so that they commiserate with you and you can all have a good laugh.  You'll probably end up making emasculating comments about your husbands too while you're at it (another huge pet peeve of mine!  Yeah, let's talk about how stupid and useless our husbands are to women we barely know - and often within earshot of said husband...and then let's wonder why husbands find comfort and status by having affairs - man!  I'm on a role today!).

My point to PG IF ladies?  Remember your roots.  Remember how emotionally painful infertility was.  How does it contrast with the physical pain of pregnancy?  Childbirth?  Would you trade one for the other?  I highly doubt it.  If you insist on complaining about your pregnancy, I only hope that it gives you great comfort.  Comfort because you are now like everyone else.  Dare I say normal?  That must feel soooo good.  For once to finally feel like a reproductively normal woman.  Hmm...maybe now I understand.  OK, I'm not mad at ya.

(This blog is better than therapy)


  1. Go Tracey!!!! I love it.

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  3. That's right girl- get it out of your system!!!! I totally understand, I hate to hear pregnant women complain. And some are more tactful than others, so it's easier to be empathetic, been then there are "those ones" who you just want to strangle.

    I agree, blogging is way better than therapy! Glad you feel better now.

  4. I hear ya and feel the same way! As hard as it was sometimes to be pregnant and on bedrest, I didn't want to ever complain b/c I was just so grateful to have the experience. It is like nothing else and I simply cannot WAIT to hear about how you feel when you have your baby (or maybe babIES)!

    I thought I had told you this (maybe even commented here, too) that I remember wanting to punch a young girl in the face one day when I was TTC-- she was in a public restroom complaining of being pregnant b/c she couldn't drink that night. Oh, I feel SO sorry for you, bitch! You're right- blogging is way better than a shrink! ;)

  5. I just came across your blog as well as this post and I LOVE IT! I'm not pregnant yet, but going through the infertility motions. I'm hoping one day it'll be my turn and I promise to always remember my roots! What I wouldn't give to be in a preggo's shoes ... they have no idea.