Wednesday, October 7, 2009

We all make mistakes right?


The nurse who called me yesterday to tell me that we were triggering last night was WRONG!  She didn't read all of the notes and gave me the wrong instructions.  In big picture perspective, it's no big deal.  I was surprised that we were triggering last night anyway.  However, I had become quite excited about it - it would have meant my shortest cycle ever which is a good thing not just because I get it over with but it signals that the eggs are robust (like Wishbone salad dressing!) and that's a good thing.  So I call the answering service last night at almost 9.  Very professional and easy.  Made me wish I had called at 7:30 when I started to become anxious about it all.  Me?  Anxious?  So they call me back and the nurse was soooo nice and felt really bad.  She didn't say "heads are gonna roll for this one" but that was the tone she used.  Oh, did I mention that I had already put all my other meds away?  Yes, for once I cleaned the table and took all the old needles and seperated them from the old meds and got the new meds in their own box, etc... I was quite organized.  Until I had to disrupt it all to open 2 new boxes!!!  At which point I had my first meltdown of this cycle.  I know it's really not a big deal.  But when you think you're done with shots and visits to the doctor and blood draws and ultrasounds and you find out that you have another day, it's quite mood altering.  So I sobbed.  Poor Russ.  He tried to comfort me and all I could say was "You're choking me" because his heavy-ass arm was around my neck as he tried to hug me.  Serioulsy his arm weighs like 20 pounds.  It's scary.  He's buff you know =)  Anyway, I boo-hooed for like 20 minutes and got it all out.  If it weren't for the circumstances I think I could say that I really enjoy crying.  It's so cleansing.  Obviously it sucks though because it means something has happened that you wish were different (though not always in my crazy world).  You may think that I overreacted, but I assure I did not.  Changing the trigger night means rearranging all my plans.  For instance I had my clothes ready for this morning but had to change it because the shirt I was going to wear would not allow me to get blood drawn without taking off.  What a pain right?  I'm teaching in classrooms this morning and now it means that I'll be really late after being assured that I would be there on time.  Sucks.  I'm meeting my friend in Maryland for dinner and now while we're eating I'll be totally distracted because I'll be waiting to hear when my trigger is.  And did I mention that I got NO SLEEP last night??  I just took an Excedrin - the headache medicine, ya know?  It has the wonderful caffeine in it and I need some.  Such a no-no I know, but I NEED it this morning.  And there's no babies in me yet.  I totally realize that I could have recived a way-worse phone call yesterday that said "We see soemthing in your blood we don't like, come in for more tests"  (cancer) and I should be happy that my doctors are vigilant in makingsure that they don't take these eggs before their time.  I would just really love to kick the ass of that nurse who f-ed up though.  We all make mistakes right?  Mmmhmm...

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